A Mandorla of Intimacy vs High Energy

I’ve been sharing workshops for nearly twenty years now, in dance and in personal process’s. And I am writing now about the challenge I see within how many students, as in the size of groups that we undertake to hold, we clearly need to make it viable as well as effective for everyone. There has often been a challenge for myself as well as for others between the necessary financial needs of the space holder/teacher and the level of intimacy that is needed for our participants. img_7426

If we are a really large group of people, then some of those participants are clearly going to feel lost and in the back ground of what is happening. Where as others will be able to step forward and take center stage and their voice will be heard.
In a smaller more intimate group, everyone has the potential of being heard and receiving attention. This is extremely important for some areas of our process and healing.
It is impossible for a large group to be held with equal connection between the teacher/space holder and students/particip487827_10151244028481583_1912567428_nants. So if we need to ensure that everyone receives that connection, then clearly the groups need to be smaller. In which case the facilitator may not find this financially viable. We need nourishing too and to be able to offer our creative work without it breaking our banks.
It has never been easy to find this balance particularly growing up in a culture of ‘big’ gatherings. I have held groups of up to 100 participants and groups of around 12, they are completely different energetically and if they are based around any particular process and not just dance, then I know the small groups are going to best serve that intimacy needed. I also trust that the ‘dance’ itself can hold us with our connection to God/Spirit, but if we are also here to communicate and connect with our ‘space holders/teachers,’  to be heard and acknowledged then that can create an impossible task.
I am big into that holding of intimacy and hearing everyone’s voice, my tendency is to lean much more into that – the voice being very key to this kind of work. We must be heard and acknowledged, there is no point in stepping back, disappearing and feeling inhibited by ‘the big group’ if we are going to find any level of healing or acceptance of our own stories. Or is that the challenge – to step up no matter what and make our way through the quagmire of our inability to show up, be seen, be heard despite the pain it evokes?
For some this will never be the right path and those who are deeply sensitive and introvert, it is simply not the way forward and never will be. Better to find that voice in the safety of intimacy than to push ones way through the crowds.
My path, I believe, really is to hold those spaces for small intimate groups, to meet with the sensitive souls who otherwise would never be heard.
I find so much creativity is found there, so many shared stories that touch the heart, so much blossoming that could not be found elsewhere.
And I encourage those who have grown up in the field of high energy big group workshops and gatherings who now find it hard to accept the struggle of small groups, trust yourself to be with that call that clearly wants to be held through you. It is very important that those spaces are held.
When it comes to financial viability, there needs to be a way to create that space too, to hold a different kind of gathering, one that nourishes ourselves as well as our participants, where we are able to immerse ourselves into the big energy, whether its dance or whatever, and know that the small intimate space will also be available to us at another time.
In order to survive and do the work I do, I need both, big energy and small intimacy. Where the big energy means less attention on the deeper work, when the high energy is designed for a different reason, to connect to God/Spirit, to find the dance within ourselves and to learn to trust in something more than our own ego. Then we can bring what we discover to that place of intimacy, to the smaller held space, to share our story and what it means to us to bring it into the world. A lot of course depends on the type of work we hold, for me it has been necessary to have a high energy to feed the dance, until I found the essence of my work which is much more suited to a smaller circle.
This is a Mandorla process in itself and it is the Mandorla that is at the root of my offering to others 🙂

About Caroline Carey

Caroline, born in 1960, grew up with a love for the wild, for nature, for animals and to dance. She wrote poetry and stories, created theater and explored the art of ritual of which she always held a fascination for. Not being of the academic type and being passionate about mystery, immagination and myth, she chose to spend her time alone with her many animals and the passion she had for ecstatic dance whether indoors or in nature. Her imagination was as wild as her life-style and by adapting the religious education insisted on by her family, she was able to recognise her own innate connection to Spirit and the spirit guides she became strongly connected to. Mothering her six, (now adult) children, Caroline has learnt the art of play, creativity, story telling and the deep surrender and unconditional love that motherhood bestows upon us.
This entry was posted in alchemy in movement, caroline carey, ceremony, dance, healing, health, middle earth medicine ways, poetry, prose, published books, rite of passage, ritual, shamanism, spirit, Spirituality, Uncategorized, voice, women and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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